But you would have none of it.

Isaiah 30:15 has been haunting me this week. "...But you would have none of it." Have none of what? Rest. Salvation. Strength. What? Me? I want rest, salvation, and strength. But how bad do I really want it? Do I seek the Lord in humility, repenting? Do I quiet my spirit before Him, trusting His ways and waiting for Him?

Or...

Do I hold onto my frustrations and anger, feeling entitled to be indignant? Do I gossip without recourse? Turn unkind words to my children? Puff myself up with how "great" I am, how much "better" my way is than another's? Do I repent of my arrogance?

When God "just isn't moving fast enough," do I wait for Him, trust Him, rest in His presence, or do I run ahead, demanding a fix, demanding an answer?

Do I know how to be quiet? Do I even know what quietness looks like? It's not weakness. For here, it's clear that our strength comes from quietness and trust. Our strength doesn't come from wrestling away the reins.

So, this week, I'm really trying. I'm trying to lay it down myself before it becomes overblown with self-importance. I'm resting in who He is, not who I think I am... or am not. I'm trying to quiet the mutters in my Spirit and listen--trust. I know that I can only be a conqueror of my enemies when I submit myself to the One that Defeats It All.

This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: "In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.