Mellow Monday

Now in the season of Lent, my thoughts have become more mellowed and reflective. Our church is acknowledging the five sorrowful mysteries, and has requested various writers and artists to share poetry and photography that reflects these points of Lent.

When I reflected on the first mystery of Christ's agony on the cross and the fruit being a true sorrow for sin, I had to ask myself some pointed questions. Do I recognize the agony that Jesus went through on my behalf? Do I agonize over my own sin, or am I flippantly throwing it at God, feeling entitled to His grace? What brings me sorrow? Do I feel sorrow for the choices that turn from God or does it more come from my own circumstances, disappointed dreams, or even my own physical appearance or desires?

How does "my cross" compare?
Out of those questions and more came this poem:

In Pitiful Contrast


.....................That’s Not Fair
.....................You just don’t
.....................Understand me.
......................Why should I?
.....................It’s not my fault.
Of all the nerve. I deserve better than that.
Who does she think she is anyway? That’s
too much to expect. It’s just unforgiveable.
Ask me if I care. It’s not my responsibility.
......................He has no right
.....................to ask that of me.
......................I don’t have time
.....................for all this. I just
.....................can’t take all this
.....................anymore. I’m too
...................tired…too busy…too
..................Well, what about me?
.................What about my needs?
.................I couldn’t help it. I just
...............couldn’t take it anymore.
...........Why that? Why now? Why me?


And this prayer/poem accompanied it--beautiful.

O Lord,
The house of my soul is narrow;
enlarge it that you may enter in.
It is ruinous, O repair it!
It displeases Your sight.
I confess it, I know.
But who shall cleanse it,
to whom shall I cry but to you?
Cleanse me from my secret faults, O Lord,
and spare Your servant from strange sins.

~St. Augustine of Hippo

This season, may our Lord continue to work in you what he began, drawing us closer to Himself in truth, righteousness, and mercy.