In honor of the Worry-free Wednesday day theme, I decided to do a little google search. Do you know that you can not only plan a worry-free vacation, but you can participate in worry-free investments, banking, business, dinners, and cell coverage? Don't worry, because every corporation and business available will ease your tensions and "guarantee" worry-free health, retirement, and home design. Well, thank goodness, what was I worried about?
What bothers me is that in an attempt to ease our anxiety, we turn not to the source of peace, but to the comforts that others seem to promise. Of course, we quickly realize that those promises are empty; in fact, as long as we are looking toward our own comfort as the end goal, our worry will continue to mount. Why? We are missing the whole point of living. As my pastor so sufficiently put it, "We (as Christ-followers) have been called to a life of sacrifice and suffering--not comfort."
Does that mean that we should allow worry to piggy-back on our sacrifice? Certainly not. God also calls us to a joyful existence. So there's the crux. When we truly sacrifice freely (letting go of our perfect and comfortable existence) then can we find the worry-free life we dreamt of--our eyes are turned to Him.
I challenge you to take a few minutes and write down your top five worries during this season of your life. Be as specific as you dare. And then, here's the scary part, ask God why those things scare you so much; what is motivating you to worry. Lastly, try to open your hands to Him and release that worry (n.b. If you are a normal, struggling Christian like myself, it will probably take you more than one time).
In all vulnerability, I am sharing my list here with you. Perhaps, in some strange way, it will encourage and challenge you.
1. I worry about Maddie's spiritual, emotional, and physical health. --I think I am afraid that I am going to screw up her life and leave her in therapy for her adult life. But the root of this fear is pride, thinking that God will not intervene, protect, or speak directly to her heart. I don't have to be the perfect parent (I won't be) and I don't have to play God in her life (Thank the Lord).
2. I worry that I'll never find the time or drive to achieve my writing/publishing goals. --I am afraid that I'll have wasted the talents God has granted me, not utilizing them to my/His full benefit. And ultimately, yes--shamefully--I'd like to be famous some day. I hate to confess that here, but I am narcissistic--not in the paparazzi sense, but in the "yeah, I've heard of her," sense. Sick, I know.
3. I worry that I'll get bored with life and do something I'll regret. My husband often tells me that I don't think enough before I [fill in the blank]. I can be pretty passionate, and yes, I am a doer. Often times my actions don't proceed from the necessary allotment of time.
4. I worry about pain. I can honestly say that I am not afraid to die. Death is not scary to me. But pain, yes. I've always been a little bit of a hypochondriac. I guess that fear comes down to my extreme desire to stay comfortable.
5. I worry about sleep. Go ahead. Laugh. I guess it is a little more silly than most. But you have no idea how much I crave, covet sleep--it's a real problem.