Thoughts on some ugly attributes that have disturbed my peace.
Here's some of them:
*Favoritism really bothers me and I really want to be better at avoiding it myself. As Beth Moore says, we should try to lift up everyone's head, not leave anyone with head lowered or eyes averted.
It's painful to be on the degrading end of favoritism and I certainly don't want to make anyone else feel that way.
I realize we can't be friends with everyone (the emotional energy would kill us), but would a smile kill us? Or a simple hello?
*Segregation or a lack of unity (yes, somewhat tied to the first one) makes me bristle--especially within Christian circles. Aren't we all part of one Body? Aren't we going to spend eternity together? Why do we act like this is some kind of competition?
*And lastly, for today, I don't like fake people. Perhaps this is me being hypocritical and playing favorites, but it's really hard for me to interact with people who refuse to express any vulnerability or depth.
I suppose all these festering problems stem from a lack of understanding. We have to know who we are and why we are here if we're going to sufficiently push away from these traps.
I have to know what God says about me (I am His; I am lovable b/c I am His, and my worth is in Him alone--not money, position, education, beauty, or status).
When I "get it" then I am free to treat people equally and not feel overwrought with disappointment when others don't treat me in turn.
So, I'm trying.
I'm not there and I still have awkward, uncomfortable moments, but I am learning to find my security in Christ, not in others.