A Piece of Cake?

When I'm pregnant my blood sugar tends to swoop way down if I don't eat a lot of protein with my carbs. And if I just sit and eat a piece of cake, oh boy, my insulin kicks into overdrive and I nearly pass out.  Steady, healthy, and constant are words I apply to my diet right now.

And this year, especially in the last few months, I've had a stronger craving for another kind of food--spiritual food.  As my mom has said in the past, I've become spiritually anorexic, naively assuming that a little nibble here and there would sustain me.

I was listening to the radio a few weeks back and someone, perhaps it was Max Lucado (I just don't remember), commented on the skewed perspective we Christians (especially this generation) have on the Scriptures.  We shouldn't view it as an occasional indulgence--a piece of cake--but as a constant daily bread.

Matthew 4:4 But Jesus told him, "No! The Scriptures say, 'People do not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.'"

Am I always going to walk away saying, "that was the best meal ever!"  or "Wow, I've never tasted anything like that before"?  No, not likely.  But that isn't the point.  Reading God's Words isn't about "the experience" or an emotional high.  It's about feeding our minds truth.  Remembering what is right, and good, and real... in a world that bombards us with lies all day.

2 Timothy 3:16 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness,

So, if you feel like you've been living on a few crumbs for a couple days and are getting irritable, try going back to the Source and His words.  Look for some solid protein and chew thoroughly. 

and oh so

grateful today...

the ache of what could be keeps me thankful for the mercy I see poured over and over, a cup that knows no bounds--His love, which really is bottomless...

and i feel regret.  how could i forget?  even for a moment? am i so blind to the water that keeps pouring out of his hands over my head, my children, my husband, my life?

we are coming out of three weeks of illness, circulating the pain and confusion back and forth and trying to keep perspective, and i think, is this a test? a trial?     ...a gift?

to be still
to reflect
to hold a child when I'd normally not
to read a book when I'd usually finish a task
to really see them, appreciate them, cradle them

and remember that not all illness leaves us.

some parents face the torment of the chronic... the fatal... and the waiting of seeing it assault that which they hold most precious in this life.

and waves wash over me, nearly drowned me, i am thankful and baffled and just want to hold them closer, capture this moment, savor it, and appreciate the life blessed to me...

for all is grace.